Author: Rabbi Michael Farbman

Twenty-seven years ago we joined Temple Emanuel. We found a warm, joyous, musical, and vibrant community- some things never change!

Over the years, we experienced numerous transitions: from the old building that served as our sanctuary to the new sanctuary constructed in 1991 (Our son Scott’s Bar Mitzvah was the first Bar Mitzvah in the new sanctuary); and the removal of the house and the construction of our new addition.

Despite these changes, the constant at TE remains the sense of community. Years ago, our son Alex was badly injured and ended up as a patient at the Hospital For Special Surgery in New York City. The TE community helped us to get through this difficult time with comforting words, meals, and expressions of friendship. We have never forgotten those expressions of kindness, and we are constantly reminded of them as we respond now to the needs of others.

Both of us attribute our strong ties to TE to Rabbi Jerry Brieger. For Max, Jerry was a breath of fresh air- his joy and enthusiasm for TE was contagious. Max served on the board of directors, as vice-president twice and president for three years. Jerry helped Nancy learn Hebrew and inspired her to participate with three other women in an adult B’nai Mitzvah ceremony. Nancy remains actively involved in supporting TE’s choir, baking, and helping in fundraising events. Together we are the first husband and wife members of the TE band.

Our sense of community is now enhanced by the leadership, energy and wisdom of Rabbi Farbman and Olga Marcus. Their excitement is evident to all of us.

We view our membership and participation at TE as important and worthwhile. By setting aside bequests in our estate plans, we hope to assist this community so that in the future it will continue to remain strong and vibrant.

Charitable contributions have always been part of our family DNA. When I sold my chemical business in 1997, my wife Barbara and I each set up a trust that would provide income for the surviving spouse, while allowing the principal to grow. Upon my death, a portion of the principal will go to a group of charities. Since Temple Emanuel was a major part of our lives, it will be a major beneficiary of our trusts.

When I talk to members as part of the legacy committee, I, of course, encourage them to make a charitable commitment to Temple Emanuel in their estate. I recognize that many members have large families and want to provide for their children and grandchildren, but I feel strongly that every family should leave some part of their estate to charity, if not Temple Emanuel then to some other organization that has had an influence on their life, be it a university, an arts organization, a medical organization, a nature organization. or a food bank. This is a way that all of us can give back something to the society which we have all benefited from.

Our family moved to Connecticut in 1999.  The adjustment was difficult, especially for our 12-year-old daughter – it was her Bat Mitzvah year.  Finding a synagogue was a priority.  Friends in Washington recommended Temple Emanuel.  We visited for Shabbat services and vividly remember how warmly we were welcomed.  A few years later, Jean attended the celebration of Jerry Brieger’s 25^th year as Rabbi of TE.  There was such a strong sense of community and love that night – for the rabbi and among the congregation members – it confirmed Jean’s desire to become an active member.  Since then, she’s served on the board, sang in the choir, led services, given D’Var Torah, chanted for Torah services, helped organize Tikkun Olam and Adult Education programs, and served as President from 2008 to 2010.  We expect to be life-long members of TE, and our Legacy Commitment enables us to contribute to sustaining the synagogue for generations to come.

We joined TE a few years after relocating to Connecticut.  While we both had pretty typical Jewish upbringings, we had never been affiliated with a congregation during our time together.  Just before the High Holidays, Barbara challenged me to find us a synagogue to belong to or at least one where we could observe the holidays. One afternoon I stumbled into Temple Emanuel.  That first encounter was enough to convince me that I had found us a shul.  Even during our then short association, we learned just how remarkable this organization is – unquestioningly welcoming.  There were not any judgements based on position or status.  Just a warm, caring group that steps up for its membership under whatever the circumstances.  In good times, and sometimes not so good, the TE community takes care of its own.  The people of this congregation have become family to us.  While we both come at our faith from different points of view, TE has made it possible for both of us to observe and participate in so many ways.

We learned about the Leave a Legacy program soon after we joined.  While we have not been in a position to make many direct contributions during our time, it seemed like a very appropriate way to make a commitment to the future of Temple Emanuel.  It costs nothing up front to support this program.  In fact, it was this commitment that prompted us this past fall to have our wills prepared with a bequest to the continued success of Temple Emanuel.  I hope that everybody who reads this can reflect on similar experiences of their own and be inspired to make the same commitment that we did.  If there is one thing I have learned about Temple Emanuel, it’s that you will always get back more than you put in.  The only way for that to continue is for all of us to put at least a little something in.